Rapport is the establishment of common ground, of acomfort zone where two or more people can mentallyjoin together. When you have rapport, each of youbrings something to the interaction—attentiveness,warmth, a sense of humor, for example—and eachbrings something back: empathy, sympathy, maybe acouple of great jokes. Rapport is the lubricant thatallows social exchanges to flow smoothly.

The prize, when you achieve rapport, is the otherperson's positive acceptance. This response won't be inso many words, but it will signal something like this:

"I know I just met you, but I like you so I will trust youwith my attention." Sometimes rapport just happens allby itself, as if by chance; sometimes you have to give it ahand. Get it right, and the communicating can begin. Getit wrong, and you'll have to bargain for attention.

As you meet and greet new people, your ability toestablish rapport will depend on four things: your attitude,your ability to "synchronize" certain aspects ofbehavior like body lan............