EXT. JOHNSON HOUSE - DAY
Carolyn steps out of the doorway and heads for the car, outof which exit her brother Michael and his country girl wifeBETTY, a stout buxom chatterbox. Both boast Florida tans andfashion styles.

　　MICHAEL(to Carolyn)Explain to me again why we didn't dothis in Des Moines in an airconditioned office?

　　CAROLYNMom's orders.

　　MICHAELLawyer here?

　　CAROLYN(nods)I have some sandwich fixings ifyou're hungry.

　　BETTY(proudly)No, we just had lunch at the hotelwith my brother and his new wife. Shetold me all the dirt. I forgot howinteresting things can get aroundhere. It was so good to see them. Thelast time we visited they were inEurope. He is doing so well. Heordered champagne. For lunch! Inearly died.

　　MICHAELI nearly died when we split the bill.

　　BETTYMichael doesn't understand. Peoplewho make the kind of money my brothermakes don't carry money on them. Theykeep it all in various accounts.

　　MICHAELThen we should have had lunch at thebank.

　　Carolyn tries not to laugh. Betty shoots him a dirty look,then stops to take in the house and its surroundings.

　　BETTYBoy. It sure has been a long time.

　　MICHAEL(correcting her)We were here two Christmases ago.

　　BETTYWell, that's a long time.

　　MICHAELIt's not that long.

　　BETTY(suddenly upset)Well, why don't I just say black soyou can say white!

　　(to Carolyn)Don't be surprised to find yourbrother hasn't changed an iota. Hehardly ever talks and when he doesit's in that tone! You should haveheard him at lunch -- not two wordsuntil the bill came and then he says,"Worth every penny."MICHAEL(defensive)SO!

　　BETTY(angry)You said it in that tone! Like youwere angry at me, my brother, atthe world for forcing you to eat anice lunch!

　　MICHAELOh Jesus.

　　BETTY(staring to cry)I simply can not stand that tone!

　　CAROLYN(sympathetically)Come inside. You're just tired fromthe trip.

　　She comforts Betty who indulges in the attention.

　　BETTYI am so sick and tired of apologizingand not knowing what I've done!

　　CAROLYNI'm sure you haven't done anything.

　　Have some iced tea. How are the kids?

　　MICHAELHe dropped them off at Betty's mom.

　　Where's Steve?

　　CAROLYN(uncomfortably)He's not coming.

　　Betty suddenly stops crying and abrasively focuses onCarolyn's problems.

　　BETTYAw, is he still cheating on you,hon?

　　Carolyn suddenly hoses sympathy for her.

　　INT. LIVING ROOM - DAYThe lawyer hands Michael a document.

　　LAWYERJust sign here as having received thecontents from the safe deposit box.

　　(Michael does)And this one, which clears the bankof all further responsibility fo0r thecontents.

　　Betty whispers to Carolyn.

　　BETTYThis is kind of exciting. You thinkwe'll find out your mother hadsecret millions lying around?

　　Carolyn smiles weakly. Michael hands back the papers.

　　LAWYERAll right. Why don't we begin.

　　He takes out Francesca's Last Will and Testament.

　　LAWYER (cont'd)Your mother has been interred atLakeside Funeral Home untilarrangements can be made.

　　MICHAEL(to Carolyn)I thought everything WAS arranged.

　　CAROLYNWell, there's a problem.

　　MICHAELWhat problem?

　　LAWYERYour mother left explicitinstructions that she wished to becremated.

　　MICHAELCremated?!

　　BETTYEeeww!

　　CAROLYNI know. I don't understand it either.

　　MICHAELWhen did she decide this?

　　LAWYER(reading will)Apparently just before her death.

　　MICHAELWell, that's crazy. I don't knowanybody who gets cremated.

　　BETTYMy Jewish friend's grandmother did.

　　MICHAELWell, no one in my family did! Dadbought cemetery plots at Oak Ridge.

　　One for him, one for mom.

　　LAWYERIt clearly states in the will --MICHAELI don't care what it says! Maybe Mamawas delirious, you know. She didn'tknow what she was saying. If shewanted to be cremated, why the helldid she let dad buy two plots, huh?

　　LAWYERWell, she was very specific. Shewanted her ashes to be thrown overRoseman Bridge.

　　MICHAELWHAT!

　　BETTYHow bizarre!

　　CAROLYNMr. Peterson, are you sure mama wroteall this?

　　LAWYERWell, it was notarized, and witnessedby a Mrs. Lucy Delaney. Maybe you canask her.

　　MICHAELWho the hell is Lucy Delaney?

　　CAROLYNI remember a Mrs. Delaney but Mamatold me years ago she died.

　　MICHAELWell, I don't care if it's legal ornot, we're not cremating her andthrowing her all over some bridgewhere we can't even go visit herbecause she's going to be blown allover the place like an ashtray.

　　BETTYNot to mention people driving overher and doggies doing their business --MICHAEL(interrupting)We're not doing it! I'm not even sureit's Christian.

　　BETTYMaybe it's an Italian thing. Theirmother was Italian.

　　MICHAELDoesn't matter. Move on.

　　The women dare not object. The lawyer raises his eyebrowsand continues:

　　LAWYERWell, we'll come back to that. Shallwe open the box?

　　JUMP CUT TO: