THE tenacity of a private lunatic asylum is unique. A little push behind your back and you slide into one; but to get out again is to scale a precipice with crumbling sides. Alfred, luckier than many, had twice nearly escaped; yet now he was tighter in than ever. His father at first meant to give him but a year or two of it, and let him out on terms, his spirit broken and Julia married. But his sister’s death was fatal to him. By Mrs. Hardie’s settlement the portion of any child of hers dying a minor, or intestate and childless, was to go to the other children; so now the prisoner had inherited his sister’s ten thousand pounds, and a good slice of his bereaved enemy’s and father’s income. But this doubled his father’s bitterness — that he, the unloved one, should be enriched by the death of the adored one! — and also tempted his cupidity: and unfortunately shallow legislation conspired with that temptation. For when an Englishman, sane or insane, is once pushed behind his back into a madhouse, those relatives who have hidden him from the public eye, i.e., from the eye of justice, can grab hold of his money behind his back, as they certified away his wits behind his back, and can administer it in the dark, and embezzle it, chanting “But for us the ‘dear deranged’ would waste it.” Nor do the monstrous enactments which confer this unconstitutional power on subjects, and shield its exercise from the light and safeguard of Publicity, affix any penalty to the abuse of that power, if by one chance in a thousand detected. In Lunacy Law extremes of intellect meet; the British senator plays at Satan; and tempts human frailty and cupidity beyond what they are able to bear.

So behold a son at twenty-one years of age devoted by a father to imprisonment for life. But stop a minute; the mad statutes, which by the threefold temptation of Facility, Obscurity, and Impurity, insure the occasional incarceration and frequent detention of sane but moneyed men, do provide, though feebly, for their bare liberation, if perchance they should not yield to the genius loci, and the natural effect of confinement plus anguish, by going mad or dying. The Commissioners of Lunacy had power to liberate Alfred in spite of his relations. And that power, you know, he had soberly but earnestly implored them to exercise.

After a delay that seemed as strange to him as postponing a hand to a drowning man, he received an official letter from Whitehall. With bounding heart he broke the seal, and devoured the contents. They ran thus —

“Sir — By order of the Commissioners of Lunacy, I am directed to inform you that they are in the receipt of your letter of the 29th ultimo, which will be laid before the Board at their next meeting. — I am, &c.”

Alfred was bitterly disappointed at the small advance he had made. However, it was a great point to learn that his letters were allowed to go to the Commissioners at all, and would be attended to by degrees.

He waited and waited, and struggled hard to possess his soul in patience. At times his brain throbbed and his blood boiled, and he longed to kill the remorseless, kinless monsters who robbed him of his liberty, his rights as a man, and his Julia. But he knew this would not do; that what they wanted was to gnaw his reason away, and then who could disprove that he had always been mad? Now he felt that brooding on his wrong would infuriate him; so he clenched his teeth, and vowed a solemn vow that nothing should drive him mad. By advice of a patient he wrote again to the Commissioners begging for a special Commission to inquire into his case; and, this done, with rare stoicism, self-defence, and wisdom in one so young, he actually sat down to read hard for his first class. Now, to do this, he wanted the Ethics, Politics, and Rhetoric of Aristotle, certain dialogues of Plato, the Comedies of Aristophanes, the first-class Historians, Demosthenes, Lucretius, a Greek Testament, Wheeler’s Analysis, Prideaux, Horne, and several books of reference sacred and profane. But he could not get these books without Dr. Wycherley, and unfortunately he had cut that worthy dead in his own asylum.

“The Scornful Dog” had to eat wormwood pudding and humble pie. He gulped these delicacies as he might; and Dr. Wycherley showed excellent qualities; he entered into his maniac’s studies with singular alacrity, supplied him with several classics from his own shelves, and borrowed the rest at the London Library. Nor did his zeal stop there; he offered to read an hour a day with him; and owned it would afford him the keenest gratification to turn out an Oxford first classman from his asylum. This remark puzzled Alfred and set him thinking; it bore a subtle family resemblance to the observations he heard every day from the patients; it was so one-eyed.

Soon Alfred became the doctor’s pet maniac. They were often closeted together in high discourse, and indeed discussed Psychology, Metaphysics, and Moral Philosophy with indefatigable zest, long after common sense would have packed them both off to bed, the donkeys. In fact, they got so thick that Alfred thought it only fair to say one day, “Mind, doctor, all these pleasant fruitful hours we spend together so sweetly will not prevent my indicting you for a conspiracy as soon as I get out: it will rob the retribution of half its relish, though.”

“Ah, my dear young friend and fellow-student,” said the doctor blandly, “let us not sacrifice the delights of our profitable occupation of imbibing the sweets of intellectual intercourse to vague speculations as to our future destiny. During the course of a long and not, I trust, altogether unprofitable career, it has not unfrequently been my lot to find myself on the verge of being indicted, sued, assassinated, hung. Yet here I sit, as yet unimmolated on the altar of phrenetic vengeance. This is ascribable to the fact that my friends and pupils always adopt a more favourable opinion of me long before I part with them; and ere many days (and this I divine by infallible indicia), your cure will commence in earnest; and in proportion as you progress to perfect restoration of the powers of judgment, you will grow in suspicion of the fact of being under a delusion; or rather I should say a very slight perversion and perturbation of the forces of your admirable intellect, and a proper subject for temporary seclusion. Indeed this consciousness of insanity is the one diagnostic of sanity that never deceives me and, on the other hand, an obstinate persistence in the hypothesis of perfect rationality demonstrates the fact that insanity yet lingers in the convolutions and recesses of the brain, and that it would not be humane as yet to cast the patient on a world in which he would inevitably be taken some ungenerous advantage of.”

Alfred ventured to inquire whether this was not rather paradoxical.

“Certainly,” said the ready doctor; “and paradoxicality is an indicial characteristic of truth in all matters beyond the comprehension of the vulgar.”

“That sounds rational,” said the maniac very drily.

One afternoon, grinding hard for his degree, he was invited downstairs to see two visitors.

At that word he found out how prison tries the nerves. He trembled with hope and fear. It was but for a moment: he bathed his face and hands to compose himself; made his toilet carefully, and went into the drawing-room, all on his guard. There he found Dr. Wycherley and two gentlemen; one was an exphysician, the other an exbarrister, who had consented to resign feelessness and brieflessness for a snug L. 1500 a year at Whitehall. After a momentary greeting they continued the conversation with Dr. Wycherley, and scarcely noticed Alfred. They were there pro forma; a plausible lunatic had pestered the Board, and extorted a visit of ceremony. Alfred’s blood boiled, but he knew it must not boil over. He contrived to throw a short, pertinent remark in every now and then. This, being done politely, told; and at last Dr. Eskell, Commissioner of Lunacy, smiled and turned to him: “Allow me to put a few questions to you.”

“The more the better, sir,” said Alfred.

Dr. Eskell then asked him to describe minutely, and in order, all he had done since seven o’clock that day. And he did it. Examined him in the multiplication table. And he did it. And, while he was applying these old-fashioned tests, Wycherley’s face wore an expression of pity that was truly comical. Now this Dr. Eskell had an itch for the classics: so he went on to say, “You have been a scholar, I hear.”

“I am not old enough to be a scholar, sir,” said Alfred; “but I am a student.”

“Well, well; now can you tell me what follows this line —

“Jusque datum sceleri canimus populuinque potentem’?”

“Why, not at the moment.”

“Oh, surely you can,” said Dr. Eskell ironically. “It is in a tolerably well-known passage. Come, try.”

“Well, I’ll try,” said Alfred, sneering secretly. “Let me see —

‘Mum — mum — mum — populumque potentem,
In sua victrici conversum viscera dextra.’”

“Quite right; now go on, if you can.”

Alfred, who was playing with his examiner all this time, pretended to cudgel his brains, then went on, and warmed involuntarily with the lines —

“Cognatasque acies et rupto foedere regni
Certatum totis concussi viribus orbis
In commune nefas; infestis que obvia signis
Signa, pares aquilas, et pila minantia pilis.”

“He seems to have a good memory,” said the examiner, rather taken aback.

“Oh, that is nothing for him,” observed Wycherley;

“He has Horace all by heart; you’d wonder:
And mouths out Homer’s Greek like thunder.”

The great faculty of Memory thus tested, Dr. Eskell proceeded to a greater: Judgment. “Spirited lines those, sir.”

“Yes, sir; but surely rather tumid. ‘The whole forces of the shaken globe?’ But little poets love big words.”

“I see; you agree with Horace, that so great a work as an epic poem should open modestly with an invocation.”

“No, sir,” said Alfred. “I think that rather an arbitrary and peevish canon of friend Horace. The AEneid, you know, begins just as he says an epic ought not to begin; and the AEneid is the greatest Latin Epic. In the next place the use of Modesty is to keep a man from writing an epic poem at all but, if he will have that impudence, why then he had better have the courage to plunge into the Castalian stream, like Virgil and Lucan, not crawl in funking and holding on by the Muse’s apron-string. But — excuse me — quorsum haec tam putida tendunt? What have the Latin poets to do with this modern’s sanity or insanity?”

Mr. Abbott snorted contemptuously in support of the query. But Dr. Eskell smiled, and said: “Continue to answer me as intelligently, and you may find it has a great deal to do with it.”

Alfred took this hint, and said artfully, “Mine was a thoughtless remark: of course a gentleman of your experience can test the mind on any subject, however trivial.” He added piteously, “Still, if you would but leave the poets, who are all half crazy themselves, and examine me in the philosophers of Antiquity. Surely it would be a higher criterion.”

Dr. Wycherley explained in a patronising whisper, “He labours under an abnormal contempt for poetry, dating from his attack. Previously to that he actually obtained a prize poem himself.”

“Well, doctor, and after that am I wrong to despise poetry?”

They might have comprehended this on paper, but spoken it was too keen for them all three. The visitors stared. Dr. Wycherley came to their aid “You might examine my young friend for hours and not detect the one crevice in the brilliancy of his intellectual armour.”

The maniac made a face as one that drinketh verjuice suddenly. “For pity’s sake, doctor, don’t be so inaccurate. Say a spot on the brilliancy, or a crevice in the armour; but not a crevice in the brilliancy. My good friend here, gentlemen, deals in conjectural certificates and broken metaphors. He dislocates more tropes, to my sorrow, than even his friend Shakespeare, whom he thinks a greater philosopher than Aristotle, and who calls the murder of an individual sleeper the murder of sleep, confounding the concrete with the abstract, and then talks of taking arms against a sea of troubles; query, a cork jacket and a flask of brandy?”

“Well, Mr. Hardie,” said Dr. Eskell, rather feebly, “let me tell you those passages, which so shock your peculiar notions, are among the most applauded.”

“Very likely, sir,” retorted the maniac, whose logic was up; “but applauded only in a nation where the floods clap their hands every Sunday morning, and we all pray for peace, giving as our exquisite reason that we have got the God of hosts on our side in war.”

Mr. Abbott, the other commissioner, had endured all this chat with an air of weary indifference. He now said to Dr. Wycherley, “I wish to put to you a question or two in private.”

Alfred was horribly frightened: this was the very dodge that had ruined him at Silverton House. “Oh no, gentlemen,” he cried imploringly. “Let me have fair play. You have given me no secret audience; then why give my accuser one? I am charged with a single delusion; for mercy’s sake, go to the point at once, and examine me on that head.”

“Now you talk sense,” said Mr. Abbott; as if the previous topics had been chosen by Alfred.

“But that will excite him,” objected Dr. Eskell? “it always does excite them.”

“It excites the insane, but not the sane,” said Alfred. “So there is another test; you will observe whether it excites me.” Then, before they could interrupt him, he glided on. “The supposed hallucination is this: I strongly suspect my father, a bankrupt — and therefore dishonest — banker, of having somehow misappropriated a sum of fourteen thousand pounds, which sum is known to have been brought from India by one Captain Dodd, and has disappeared.”

“Stop a minute,” said Mr. Abbott. “Who knows it besides you?”

“The whole family of the Dodds. They will show you his letter from India, announcing his return with the money.”

“Where do they live?”

“Albion Villa, Barkington.”

Mr. Abbott noted the address in his book, and Alfred, mightily cheered and encouraged by this sensible act, went on to describe the various indications, which, insufficient singly, had by their united force driven him to his conclusion. When he described David’s appearance and words on his father’s lawn at night, Wycherley interrupted him quietly: “Are you quite sure this was not a vision, a phantom of the mind heated by your agitation, and your suspicions?”

Dr. Eskell nodded assent, knowing nothing about the matter.

“Pray, doctor, was I the only person who saw this vision?” inquired Alfred slily.

“I conclude so,” said Wycherley, with an admirable smile.

“But why do you conclude so? Because you are one of those who reason in a circle of assumptions. Now it happens that Captain Dodd was seen and felt on that occasion by three persons besides myself.”

“Name them,” said Mr. Abbott sharply.

“A policeman called Reynolds, another policeman, whose name I don’t know, and Miss Julia Dodd. The policemen helped me lift Captain Dodd off the grass, sir; Julia met us chose by, and we four carried Dr. Wycherhey’s phantom home together to Albion Villa.”

Mr. Abbott noted down all the names, and then turned to Dr. Wycherley. “What do you say to that?”

“I say it is a very important statement,” said the doctor blandly; “and that I am sure my young friend would not advance it unless he was firmly persuaded of its reality.”

“Much obliged, doctor; and you would not contradict me so rashly in a matter I know all about and you know nothing about, if it was not your fixed habit to found facts on theories instead of theories on facts.”

“There, that is enough,” said Mr. Abbott. “I have brought you both to an issue at last. I shall send to Barkington, and examine the policemen and the Dodds.”

“Oh, thank you, sir,” cried Alfred with emotion. “If you once apply genuine tests like that to my case, I shall not be long in prison.”

“Prison?” said Wycherley reproachfully.

“Have you any complaint, then, to make of your treatment here?” inquired Dr. Eskell.

“No, no, sir,” said Alfred warmly. “Dr. Wycherley is the very soul of humanity. Here are no tortures, no handcuffs nor leg-locks, no brutality, no insects that murder Sleep — without offence to Logic. In my last asylum the attendants inflicted violence, here they are only allowed to endure it. And, gentlemen, I must tell you a noble trait in my enemy there: nothing can make him angry with madmen; their lies, their groundless and narrow suspicions of him, their deplorable ingratitude to him, of which I see examples every day that rile me on his account; all these things seem to glide off him, baffled by the infinite kindness of his heart and the incomparable sweetness of his temper; and he returns the duffers good for evil with scarcely an effort.”

At this unexpected tribute the water stood in the doctor’s eyes. It was no more than the truth; but this was the first maniac he had met intelligent enough to see his good qualities clearly and express them eloquently.

“In short,” continued Alfred, “to be happy in his house all a man wants is to be insane. But, as I am not insane, I am miserable; no convict, no galley slave is so wretched as I am, gentlemen. And what is my crime?”

“Well, well,” said Dr. Eskell kindly, “I think it likely you will not be very long in confinement.” They then civilly dismissed him; and on his departure asked Dr. Wycherley his candid opinion. Dr. Wycherley said he was now nearly cured; his ability to discuss his delusion without excitement was of itself a proof of that. But in another month he would be better still. The doctor concluded his remarks thus —

“However, gentlemen, you have heard him: now judge for yourselves whether anybody can be as clever as he is, without the presence of more or less abnormal excitement of the organs of intelligence.”

It was a bright day for Alfred; he saw he had made an excellent impression on the Commissioners, and, as luck does not always come single, after many vain attempts to get a letter posted to Julia, he found this very afternoon a nurse was going away next day. He offered her a guinea, and she agreed to post a letter. Oh the hapiness it was to the poor prisoner to write it, and unburden his heart and tell his wrongs. He kept his manhood for his enemies; his tears fell on the paper he sent to his forlorn bride. He had no misgivings of her truth; he judged her by himself: gave her credit for anxiety, but not for doubt. He concluded a long, ardent, tender letter by begging her to come and see him, and, if refused admission, to publish his case in the newspapers, and employ a lawyer to proceed against all the parties concerned in his detention. Day after day he waited for an answer to his letter; none came. Then he began to be sore perplexed, and torn with agonising doubts. What if her mind was poisoned too! What if she thought him mad! What if some misfortune had befallen her! What if she had believed him dead, and her heart had broken! Hitherto he had seen his own trouble chiefly; but now he began to think day and night on hers; and though he ground on for his degree not to waste time, and not to be driven mad, yet it was almost superhuman labour; sighs issued from his labouring breast while his hard, indomitable brain laboured away, all uphill, at Aristotle’s Divisions and Definitions.

On the seventh day, the earliest the mad statute allowed, the two Commissioners returned, and this time Mr. Abbott took the lead, and told him that the policeman............