Captain Whiffle sends for me — his situation described — his surgeon arrives, prescribes for him, and puts him to bed — a bed is put up for Mr. Simper contiguous to the state room, which, with other parts of the captains behaviour, gives the ship’s company a very unfavourable idea of their commander — I am detained in the West Indies by the admiral, and go on board of the Lizard sloop of war in quality of surgeon’s mate, where I make myself known to the surgeon, who treats me very kindly — I go on shore, sell my ticket, purchase necessaries, and, at my return on board, am surprised at the sight of Crampley, who is appointed lieutenant of the sloop — we sail on a cruise-take a prize in which I arrive at Port Morant under the command of my messmate, with whom I live in great harmony

He was going on with an eulogium upon the captain, when I received a message to clean myself, and go up to the great cabin: and with this command I instantly complied, sweetening myself with rosewater from the medicine chest. When I entered the room, I was ordered to stand by the door, until Captain Whiffle had reconnoitered me at a distance with a spy-glass. He, having consulted one sense in this manner, bade me advance gradually, that his nose might have intelligence before it could be much offended: I therefore approached with great caution and success, and he was pleased to say, “Ay, this creature is tolerable.” I found him lolling on his couch with a languishing air, his head supported by his valet-de-chambre, who from time to time applied a smelling-bottle to his nose. “Vergette,” said he in a squeaking tone, “dost think this wretch (meaning me) will do me no injury? May I venture to submit my arm to him?” “Pon my word,” replied the valet, “I do tink dat dere be great occasion for your honour losing a small quantite of blodt; and the young man ave quelque chose of de bonne mine.” “Well, then,” said his master, “I think I must venture.” Then, addressing himself to me, “Hast thou ever blooded anybody but brutes? But I need not ask thee, for thou wilt tell me a most d — able lie,” “Brutes, sir!” answered I, pulling down his glove, in order to feel his pulse, “I never meddle with brutes.” “What the devil art thou about?” cried he, “dost thou intend to twist off my hand? Gad’s curse! my arm is benumbed up to the very shoulder! Heaven have mercy upon me! must I perish under the hands of savages? What an unfortunate dog was I to come on board without my own surgeon, Mr. Simper.” I craved pardon for having handled him so roughly, and, with the utmost care, and tenderness, tied up his arm with a fillet of silk. While I was feeling for the vein, he desired to know how much blood I intended to take from him, and, when I answered, “not above twelve ounces,” started up with a look full of horror, and bade me be gone, swearing I had a design upon his life. Vergette appeased him with difficulty, and, opening a bureau, took out a pair of scales, in one of which was placed a small cup; and putting them into my hand, told me, the captain never lost above an ounce and three drams at one time.

While I prepared for this important evacuation, there came into the cabin a young man gaily dressed, of a very delicate complexion with a kind of languid smile on his face: which seemed to have been rendered habitual by a long course of affectation. The captain no sooner perceived him, than, rising hastily, he flew into his arms, crying, “O, my dear Simper, I am excessively disordered! I have been betrayed, frighted, murdered, by the negligence of my servants, who suffered a beast, a mule, a bear, to surprise me, and stink me into convulsions with the fumes of tobacco.” Simper, who by this time, I found, was obliged to act for the clearness of his complexion, assumed an air of softness and sympathy, and lamented with many tender expressions of sorrow, the sad accident that had thrown him into that condition; then, feeling his patient’s pulse on the outside of his glove, gave it as his opinion, that his disorder was entirely nervous, and that some drops of tincture of castor, and liquid laudanum, would be of more service to him than bleeding, by bridling the inordinate sallies of his spirits, and composing the fermentation of his bile. I was therefore sent to prepare this prescription, which was administered in a glass of sack posset, after the captain had been put to bed, and orders sent to the officers on the quarter-deck, to let nobody walk on that side under which he lay.

While the captain enjoyed his repose the doctor watched over him, and indeed became so necessary, that a cabin was made for him contiguous to the state room where Whiffle slept, that he might be at hand in case of accidents in the night. Next day, our commander being happily recovered, gave orders that none of the lieutenants should appear upon deck without a wig, sword, and ruffles; nor any midshipman, or other petty officer, he seen with a check shirt or dirty linen. He also prohibited any person whatever, except Simper and his own servants, from coming into the great cabin without first sending in to obtain leave. These singular regulations did not prepossess the ship’s company in his favour: but, on the contrary, gave scandal an opportunity to be very busy with his character, and accuse him of maintaining a correspondence with his surgeon not fit to be named.

In a few weeks, our ship being under sailing orders, I was in hope of revisiting my native country, in a very short time, when the admiral’s surgeon ca............