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CHAPTER 1.
 It is with some degree of awe1 that I touch upon the enigma2 of my impressions at the commencement of my life. I am almost doubtful whether they had reality within my own experience, or whether they are not, rather, recollections mysteriously transmitted—I feel an almost sacred hesitation3 when I would fathom4 their depths.  
I came forth5 from the darkness of unconsciousness very gradually, for my mind was illumined only fitfully, but then by outbursts of splendor6 that compelled and fascinated my infant gaze. When the light was extinguished, I lapsed7 once more into the non-consciousness of the new-born animal, of the tiny plant just germinating8.
 
The history of my earliest years is that of a child much indulged and petted to whom nothing of moment happened; and into whose narrow, protected life no jarring came that was not foreseen, and the shock of which was not deadened with solicitous9 care. In my manners I was always very tractable10 and submissive. That I may not make my recital11 tedious, I will note without continuity and without the proper transitions those moments which are impressed upon my mind because of their strangeness, those moments that are still so vividly12 remembered, although I have forgotten many poignant13 sorrows, many lands, adventures, and places.
 
I was at that time like a fledgling swallow living high up in a niche14 in the eaves, who from time to time peeps out over the top of its nest with its little bright eyes. With the eyes of imagination it sees into the deeps of space, although to the actual vision only a courtyard and street are visible; and it sees into depths which it will presently need to journey through. It was during such moments of clairvoyance15 that I had a vision of the infinity16 of which before my present life I was a part. Then, in spite of myself, my consciousness flagged, and for days together I lived the tranquil17, subconscious18 life of early childhood.
 
At first my mind, altogether unimpressed and undeveloped, may be compared to a photographer's apparatus19 fitted with its sensitized glass. Objects insufficiently20 lighted up make no impression upon the virgin21 plates; but when a vivid splendor falls upon them, and when they are encircled by disks of light, these once dim objects now engrave22 themselves upon the glass. My first recollections are of bright summer days and sparkling noon times,—or more truly, are recollections of the light of wood fires burning with great ruddy flames.


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