There was a tap at the door. Sam sat up dizzily. He had lost all count of time.
"Who's that?"
"I have a note for you, sir."
It was the level voice of J. B. Midgeley, the steward. The stewards of the White Star Line, besides being the civillest and most obliging body of men in the world, all have soft and pleasant voices. A White Star steward, waking you up at six-thirty, to tell you that your bath is ready, when you wanted to sleep on till twelve, is the nearest human approach to the nightingale.
"A what?"
"A note, sir."
Sam jumped up and switched on the light. He went to the door and took the note from J. B. Midgeley, who, his mission accomplished, retired in an orderly manner down the passage. Sam looked at the letter with a thrill. He had never seen the handwriting before, but, with the eye of love, he recognised it. It was just the sort of hand he would have expected Billie to write, round and smooth and flowing, the writing of a warm-hearted girl. He tore open the envelope.
"Please come up to the top deck. I want to speak to you."
Sam could not disguise it from himself that he was a little disappointed. I don't know if you see anything wrong with the letter, but the way Sam looked at it was that, for a first love-letter, it might have been longer and perhaps a shade warmer. And, without running any risk of writer's cramp, she might have signed it.
However, these were small matters. No doubt the dear girl had been in a hurry and so forth. The important point was that he was going to see her. When a man's afraid, sings the bard, a beautiful maid is a cheering sight to see; and the same truth holds good when a man has made an exhibition of himself at a ship's concert. A woman's gentle sympathy, that was what Samuel Marlowe wanted more than anything else at the moment. That, he felt, was what the doctor ordered. He scrubbed the burnt cork off his face with all possible speed and changed his clothes and made his way to the upper deck. It was like Billie, he felt, to have chosen this spot for their meeting. It would be deserted and it was hallowed for them both by sacred associations.
She was standing at the rail, looking out over the water. The moon was quite full. Out on the horizon to the south its light shone on the sea, making it look like the silver beach of some distant fairy island. The girl appeared to be wrapped in thought and it was not till the sharp crack of Sam's head against an overhanging stanchion announced his approach, that she turned.
"Oh, is that you?"
"Yes."
"You've been a long time."
"It wasn't an easy job," explained Sam, "getting all that burnt cork off. You've no notion how the stuff sticks. You have to use butter...."
She shuddered.
"Don't!"
"But I did. You have to with burnt cork."
"Don't tell me these horrible things." Her voice rose almost hysterically. "I never want to hear the words burnt cork mentioned again as long as I live."
"I feel exactly the same." Sam moved to her side. "Darling," he said in a low voice, "it was like you to ask me to meet you here. I know what you were thinking. You thought that I should need sympathy. You wanted to pet me, to smooth my wounded feelings, to hold me in your arms and tell me that, as we loved each other, what did anything else matter?"
"I didn't."
"You didn't?"
"No, I didn't."
"Oh, you didn't? I thought you did!" He looked at her wistfully. "I thought," he said, "that possibly you might have wished to comfort me. I have been through a great strain. I have had a shock...."
"And what about me?" she demanded passionately. "Haven't I had a shock?"
He melted at once.
"Have you had a shock too? Poor little thing! Sit down and tell me all about it."
She looked away from him, her face working.
"Can't you understand what a shock I have had? I thought you were the perfect knight."
"Yes, isn't it?"
"Isn't what?"
"I thought you said it was a perfect night."
"I said I thought _you_ were the perfect knight."
"Oh, ah!"
A sailor crossed the deck, a dim figure in the shadows, went over to a sort of raised summerhouse with a brass thingummy in it, fooled about for a moment, and went away again. Sailors earn their money easily.
"Yes?" said Sam when he had gone.
"I forget what I was saying."
"Something about my being the perfect knight."
"Yes. I thought you were."
"That's good."
"But you're not!"
"No?"
"No!"
"Oh!"
Silence fell. Sam was feeling hurt and bewildered. He could not understand her mood. He had come up expecting to be soothed and comforted and she was like a petulant iceberg. Cynically, he recalled some lines of poetry which he had had to write out a hundred times on one occasion at school as a punishment for having introduced a white mouse into chapel.
"Oh, woman, in our hours of ease,
Un-something, something, something, please.
When tiddly-umpty umpty brow,
A something something something thou!"
He had forgotten the exact words, but the gist of it had been that Woman, however she might treat a man in times of prosperity, could be relied on to rally round and do the right thing when he was in trouble. How little the poet had known woman.
"Why not?" he said huffily.
She gave a little sob.
"I put you on a pedestal and I find you have feet of clay. You have blurred the image which I formed of you. I can never think of you again without picturing you as you stood in that saloon, stammering and helpless...."
"Well, what can you do when your pianist runs out on you?"
"You could have done _something_!" The words she had spoken only yesterday to Jane Hubbard came back to her. "I can't forgive a man for looking ridiculous. Oh, what, what," she cried, "induced you to try to give an imitation of Bert Williams?"
Sam started, stung to the quick.
"It wasn't Bert Williams. It was Frank Tinney!"
"Well, how was I to know?"
"I did my best," said Sam sullenly.
"That is the awful thought."
"I did it for your sake."
"I know. It gives me a horrible sense of guilt." She shuddered again. Then suddenly, with the nervous quickness of a woman unstrung, thrust a small black golliwog into his hand. "Take it!"
"What's this?"
"You bought it for me yesterday at the barber's shop. It is the only present which you have given me. Take it back."
"I don't want it. I shouldn't know what to do with it."
"You must take it," she said in a low voice. "It is a symbol."
"A what?"
"A symbol of our broken love."
"I don't see how you make that out. It's a golliwog."
"I can never marry you now."
"What! Good heavens! Don't be absurd."
"I can't!"
"Oh, go on, have a dash at it," he said encouragingly, though his heart was sinking.
She shook her head.
"No, I couldn't."
"Oh, hang it all!"
"I couldn't. I'm a very strange girl...."
"You're a very silly girl...."
"I don't see what right you have to say that," she flared.
"I don't see what right you have to say you can't marry me and try to load me up with golliwogs," he retorted with equal heat.
"Oh, can't you understand?"
"No, I'm dashed if I can."
She looked at him despondently.
"When I said I would marry you, you were a hero to me. You stood to me for everything that was noble and brave and wonderful. I had only to shut my eyes to conjure up the picture of you as you dived off the rail that morning. Now--" her voice trembled "--if I shut my eyes now, I can only see a man with a hideous black face making himself the laughing stock of the ship. How could I marry you, haunted by that picture?"
"But, good heavens, you talk as though I made a habit of blacking up! You talk as though you expected me to come to the altar smothered in burnt cork."
"I shall always think of you as I saw you to-night." She looked at him sadly. "There's a bit of black still on your left ear."
He tried to take her hand. But she drew it away. He fell back as if struck.
"So this is the end," he muttered.
"Yes. It's partly on your ear and partly on your cheek."
"So this is the end," he repeated.
"You had better go below and ask your steward to give you some more butter."
He laughed bitterly.
"Well, I might have expected it. I might have known what would happen! Eustace warned me. Eustace was right. He knows women--as I do now. Women! What mighty ills have not been done by woman? Who was't betrayed the what's-its-name? A woman! Who lost ... lost ... who lost ... who--er--and so on? A woman.... So all is over! There is nothing to be said but good-bye?"
"No."
"Good-bye, then, Miss Bennett!"
"Good-bye," said Billie sadly. "I--I'm sorry."
"Don't mention it!"
"You do understand, don't you?"
"You have made everything perfectly clear."
"I hope--I hope you won't be unhappy."