Let me tell you rather of my thoughts than of my moods, for there at least one comes to something with a form that may be and a substance that is measurable; one ceases to struggle with things indefinable and the effort to convey by and imaginary voices things that are at once bodiless and soundless and lightless and yet close and real. And moreover with that mysterious and subtle change of heart in me there came also a change in the quality and range of my ideas. I seemed to rise out of a of immediacies and misconceptions, to see more largely and more freely than I had ever done before.  
I have told how in my and wounded phase I had snatched at the dull project of improving my languages, and under the cloak of that spying a little upon German military arrangements. Now my mind set such petty romanticism on one side. It had recovered the strength to look on the whole of life and on my place in it. It could resume the ideas that our storm of passion had for a time thrust into the background of my thoughts. I took up again all those broad that had arisen out of my experiences in South Africa, and which I had been not so much fitting into as forcing into the formulæ of English politics; I recalled my disillusionment with British , my vague but elaborating of a profound conflict between enterprise and , a profound conflict between the life of the farm and the life of trade and finance and production, as being something far truer to realities than any of the issues of party and upon which men were spending their lives. So far as this between England and Germany, which so the imagination of Europe, went, I found that any faith I may have had in its importance had simply fallen out of my mind. As a danger to civilization, as a conceivable source of destruction and delay, it was a business enough, but that in the long run it mattered how or when they fought and which won I did not believe. In the development of mankind the thing was of far less importance than the............