I was in a state of great excitement when I left him—a mixture of hope and anguish aroused by the ascendency of his words. They had been so clear and categorical, too. I could so vividly imagine the movement of salvation within our reach. The German right, harassed by a dizzy offensive, no doubt experiencing difficulties in the replenishment of supplies, after having lightly embarked on this broad movement of conversion—with us as a living menace on its flank, well supported by the camp (were our numbers large enough? That was the chief point), well rested and provided with ammunition ... what a lot of trumps we should hold in the advantage of taking them by surprise; the consciousness of the justice of our cause, the strength drawn from contact with our Mother City. I was possessed with the idea that a decision was urgent. Was not this the day and the hour, even the minute, that historians would designate to all eternity as that in which our supreme chance of victory occurred?
My heart was beating madly. I tried in vain to calm myself by the usual reflections. I could so well picture the alternative being laid before the governor of Paris. Either to reserve his army in view of the[Pg 420] probable siege, or else to hurl it into the furnace down to the last battalion.
It was a formidable initiative. The fate of the country in his hands! All my being was strained, almost to breaking point, towards the side of boldness. I would have given ten years of my life that this man's heart might be well tempered.
I walked feverishly through the streets wherever chance led me, looking for someone to talk to. I met De Valpic, but he was exhausted and was going to rest.
Guillaumin had been warned for orderly duty at the Town Hall. I went to see him, but did not get much out of him as he was absorbed in his duties. It was a sight to warm the heart, this string of inhabitants, coming, each one of them, to offer to have soldiers billeted on them.
On leaving there, I went to have a look at my men who were cleaning themselves up and mending their clothes—a laudable care for their personal appearance, and a way of passing time. According to the general opinion, we should be there for some time.
I continued my walk and extended its area. I came to a vague piece of ground bordered by a hedge. I distinguished the murmur of voices behind it, and caught sight of some uniforms. Someone exclaimed:
"Take care!"
I showed myself. Then they laughed.
"Halloa! That you, Dreher?"
Five or six of my comrades from the fifth battalion were seated there in a circle, Ladmiraut and Miquel among others; Fortin, too. I was delighted. It will be remembered that I had not seen him since the incident at the "Globe."
I went and sat down beside him and began to talk[Pg 421] to him in a cordial tone. Idiotic, the fuss that had been made! Did they still continue to worry him?
"Not a bit."
He spoke rather coldly. Miquel intervened.
"Rather not! He's in my platoon. I let him off the troublesome fatigues."
The conversation seemed to be hanging fire. I asked:
"What were you talking about when I arrived?"
"Oh, nothing much—nothing at all interesting. You got any news?"
I was stupidly inspired to tell them of little Frémont's death.
"Poor boy!" sighed Laraque.
"Whose turn is it now?" Fortin remarked.
Silence fell again. I said:
"You don't seem very enthusiastic here."
"Not much reason to be."
"Oh, come!"
Fortin gave a start, but his neighbour nudged him, saying:
"That your opinion?"
There were smiles. My reputation as a scoffer was indeed well established. Fortin, without addressing me in particular, murmured:
"I wonder if there are still any optimists left?"
"Of course," I said. "Myself for one."
He gazed at me, refusing to take me seriously; then said, in a tired voice:
"I am stating results. The war has been going on for just five weeks and where have we got to? We've been beaten everywhere and thrown back on our final redoubt. The amount that was said about defending the least particle of ground foot by foot,[Pg 422] till the last extremity! The extremity has soon come. Let's establish the balance: Lille, Arras, Amiens, Beauvais, St. Quentin, Mézières, Rheims—by this time probably Meaux and Chalons; possibly Nancy! A quarter of France invaded. No, I tell you, there's nothing to be done. They were ready; that's all. They knew what they wanted."
I interrupted him, quivering all over. It was my turn now to copy Guillaumin.
"Then, according to you, everything is lost?"
"Oh," he said, "the men are first rate. There's nothing lost by admitting that. They will probably hold out to the end, in face of all hope, for honour's sake."
"And you'll be one of the first to do so," said Miquel.
"Just like everyone else. It's in our blood. I see our line of resistance on the Loire, then on the Garonne. The wretched government will have to move house again."
"How you run on! And Paris?"
"It's lucky they didn't bear straight down on it. They'd be entering it at this very moment."
"Perhaps they had some reason...."
"Bah!"
"All our armies on their flank."
"Our poor armies! A lot there is left of them!"
"Really? Look at our regiment. Is it at full strength? Have its numbers been made up to what they were at the start? Yes. Well, it's the same thing everywhere. All the dep?ts have supplied men. As we fell back we recuperated our reserves while, as long as their communications go on extending, their front loses in density. They are no longer so im[Pg 423]mensely superior to us in numbers as they were at the beginning, and their movements are anything but free. Maubeuge was not taken yesterday."
"But it will be to-day."
"One day gained."
"Oh, yes! That's a good joke, that idea about holding out."
"Holding out, exactly. We've got to the thirty-fifth day of war. According to the German plans, we were to be annihilated by that date. Are we? No. There are all kinds of things lacking."
"All kinds?" Fortin said ironically.
"Our line is not broken anywhere; we have only wheeled. You spoke of Nancy just now. They'd better come and take it from Castelnau! Do you really want to know what I think? I think they're the ones that are in the soup."
A buzz of scepticism greeted my declaration. I continued:
"First of all, here they are forced to take how many?—three or four army corps back to the East."
"To the East? Why?"
"Against the Russians."
"Where did you get hold of that idea?"
"In the papers."
"Are they to be had?"
"If you look for them."
I shook them.
"You're not curious! You know nothing, then? Not even you, Fortin? Really? Nothing of our Allies' successes?"
He raised himself.
"But look here, are these tales serious?"
[Pg 424]
"What d'you mean? Their advance exceeds all expectations."
I summed up the triple Slav offensive in Prussia, Galicia, and Bosnia.
They seemed to doubt my statements. I abruptly pulled a newspaper out of my pocket, spread it out, and read out the headlines of the articles. I called their attention to the illustration, a mighty Cossack pointing his lance at Berlin.
They pressed round me, crushing me, their hands seizing the paper and their eyes devouring the contents. When their first thirst was allayed I continued in the most serious tone:
"There's a first motive for confidence. For the second?... But you've only got to look at these Sunday crowds. Talk to them and you'll soon see. We are seeing Paris at her most noble aspect. Don't you realise that we are living through the most glorious days in our history? For the first time we have avoided weakening ourselves by political convulsions in the face of danger. That will save us, simply."
Some of them nodded in approval. Fortin tried to weaken the impression I had made.
"The papers say what they choose."
I attacked him.
"And what about you—what are your statements based on?"
"I should be only too glad," he protested, "to see things take a turn for the better."
"No, you don't wish for our success," I cried. "Or at least not ardently enough. You are the victim of your standpoint. For months now you have been repeating in your lectures and articles that you know[Pg 425] Germany inside out; that she is powerful and irresistible; that the future of Europe lies with her while we merely represent a past about to vanish. Ever since the beginning of the campaign you've been waiting, with bowed head, for your prophecies to be fulfilled. I can imagine you warning your companions that 'that will not last,' whenever any good news arrives, and saying, 'I told you so!' at each setback. And if you regret it as a Frenchman, which is quite possible, it's quite obvious that as a philosophical witness you unconsciously rejoice. You misrepresent the reality. Your vision is warped. You immediately look at the worst side when endless possibilities are open to you. Do you wonder that the future looks black to you in such circumstances? But the most annoying part is that you demoralise those around you. I implore you to make an effort. Try to be impartial and honest. Consider all the signs in our favour to-day."
I continued. I was speaking quickly, overcoming the obscure embarrassment which usually paralyses me, when it is a question of holding the attention of an audience. I let my conviction burst forth. I poured out the arguments I had collected in an imperious flood. By expressing them I discovered in them fresh truth and amplitude. Far from becoming involved and detra............