Mrs. Jewls rang her cowbell. "I have some wonderful news," she said.

The children stopped what they were doing and looked up. They waited for Mrs. Jewls to tell them the wonderful news.

"You are a very lucky class indeed," said Mrs. Jewls. "Mrs. Waloosh, the world famous dancer, will be coming here to Wayside School! She will teach you how to dance!"

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Everyone was still waiting for the wonderful news.

"Isn\'t that exciting?" asked Mrs. Jewls. "You will see her every Wednesday instead of going to P.E."

"Will girls have to dance with boys?" asked Jenny.

"I suppose," said Mrs. Jewls.

"Gross!" exclaimed Leslie.

"Yuck!" said Dana.

"Will boys have to dance with girls?" asked Ron.

"Obviously," said Mrs. Jewls.

"No way!" said Eric Fry.

"I\'d rather dance with a dead rat!" said Terrence.

Everybody started talking at once-about cooties, and warts, and other horrible diseases you get from touching girls or boys.

Mrs. Jewls rang her cowbell again and told them to settle down.

"Mrs. Jewls, I don\'t need to take dancing lessons," said Eric Bacon. "I already know how to dance!"

"Yes, Eric, I\'ve seen you \'dance,\' " Mrs. Jewls said sarcastically.

Eric Bacon was a great breakdancer. But break-dancing was no longer allowed at Wayside School. That was because every time Eric danced, he broke something.

"Mrs. Waloosh will teach you the grace and beauty of classical ballroom dancing," said Mrs. Jewls.

Everybody groaned.

On Wednesday they all headed down to their first

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dancing lesson. Except Myron. Myron went to P.E.

"How come Myron never has to do anything?" asked Jason.

"I don\'t know!" said Calvin. "I\'ve been wondering about that too."

"Myron\'s father must be friends with the president," said Bebe.

"I think Myron gave Mr. Kidswatter a thousand dollars," said Todd.

"No, I bet he\'s blackmailing Mrs. Jewls," said Jenny.

"How could he do that?" asked Benjamin.

"Maybe Mrs. Jewls got drunk!" said Jenny. "And then she danced on top of her desk with a lampshade on her head. And Myron took her picture. And so now Mrs. Jewls has to let Myron do anything he wants, or else he\'ll show the picture to Mr. Kid-swatter!"

"That makes sense," said Mac.

"Except if she had a lampshade on her head, how would Mr. Kidswatter know it was Mrs. Jewls?" asked Todd.

No one knew the answer to that.

They entered the room on the second floor.

"Welcome!" said Mrs. Waloosh, a strange-looking woman with bright red hair. It looked like her head was on fire. "My name eez Meez Valooosh. It\'s so wonderful to be here at Vayside School."

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She wore pink tights and a sparkling pink top. "I hope ve vill be friends, yes?" she asked.

Nobody said a word.

All around were red and green balls. There was also one yellow ball. This was the room where Louis kept the balls for lunch and recess. It was also the room that was always used for school dances. It was the ballroom.

"So!" exclaimed Mrs. Waloosh. "Who vill be first?"

Everyone tried to hide behind someone else.

Mrs. Waloosh put her hands on Ron\'s face. "Vhat eez your name?" she asked............