“I HAVE FORESEEN . . . ,” ALICE BEGAN IN AN OMINOUS tone.

　　Edward threw an elbow toward her ribs, which she neatly dodged.

　　“Fine,” she grumbled. “Edward is making me do this. But I did foresee that you would be more difficult if Isurprised you.”

　　We were walking to the car after school, and I was completely clueless as to what she was talking about.

　　“In English?” I requested.

　　“Don’t be a baby about this. No tantrums.”

　　“Now I’m scared.”

　　“So you’re — I mean we’re — having a graduation party. It’s no big thing. Nothing to freak out over. ButI saw that you would freak out if I tried to make it a surprise party” — she danced out of the way as Edwardreached over to muss her hair — “and Edward said I had to tell you. But it’s nothing. Promise.”

　　I sighed heavily. “Is there any point in arguing?”

　　“None at all.”

　　“Okay, Alice. I’ll be there. And I’ll hate every minute of it. Promise.”

　　“That’s the spirit! By the way, I love my gift. You shouldn’t have.”

　　“Alice, I didn’t!”

　　“Oh, I know that. But you will.”

　　I racked my brains in panic, trying to remember what I’d ever decided to get her for graduation that shemight have seen.

　　“Amazing,” Edward muttered. “How can someone so tiny be so annoying?”

　　Alice laughed. “It’s a talent.”

　　“Couldn’t you have waited a few weeks to tell me about this?” I asked petulantly. “Now I’ll just bestressed that much longer.”

　　Alice frowned at me.

　　“Bella,” she said slowly. “Do you know what day it is?”

　　“Monday?”

　　She rolled her eyes. “Yes. It is Monday . . . the fourth.” She grabbed my elbow, spun me halfway around,and pointed toward a big yellow poster taped to the gym door. There, in sharp black letters, was the date ofgraduation. Exactly one week from today.

　　“It’s the fourth? Of June? Are you sure?”

　　Neither one answered. Alice just shook her head sadly, feigning disappointment, and Edward’s eyebrowslifted.

　　“It can’t be! How did that happen?” I tried to count backwards in my head, but I couldn’t figure outwhere the days had gone.

　　I felt like someone had kicked my legs out from under me. The weeks of stress, of worry . . . somehow inthe middle of all my obsessing over the time, my time had disappeared. My space for sorting through it all, formaking plans, had vanished. I was out of time.

　　And I wasn’t ready.

　　I didn’t know how to do this. How to say goodbye to Charlie and Renée . . . to Jacob . . . to beinghuman.

　　I knew exactly what I wanted, but I was suddenly terrified of getting it.

　　In theory, I was anxious, even eager to trade mortality for immortality. After all, it was the key to stayingwith Edward forever. And then there was the fact that I was being hunted by known and unknown parties. I’drather not sit around, helpless and delicious, waiting for one of them to catch up with me.

　　In theory, that all made sense.

　　In practice . . . being human was all I knew. The future beyond that was a big, dark abyss that I couldn’tknow until I leaped into it.

　　 This simple knowledge, today’s date — which was so obvious that I must have been subconsciouslyrepressing it — made the deadline I’d been impatiently counting down toward feel like a date with the firingsquad.

　　In a vague way, I was aware of Edward holding the car door for me, of Alice chattering from thebackseat, of the rain hammering against the windshield. Edward seemed to realize I was only there in body; hedidn’t try to pull me out of my abstraction. Or maybe he did, and I was past noticing.

　　We ended up at my house, where Edward led me to the sofa and pulled me down next to him. I staredout the window, into the liquid gray haze, and tried to find where my resolve had gone. Why was I panickingnow? I’d known the deadline was coming. Why should it frighten me that it was here?

　　I don’t know how long he let me stare out the window in silence. But the rain was disappearing intodarkness when it was finally too much for him.

　　He put his cold hands on either side of my face and fixed his golden eyes on mine.

　　“Would you please tell me what you are thinking? Before I go mad?”

　　What could I say to him? That I was a coward? I searched for words.

　　“Your lips are white. Talk, Bella.”

　　I exhaled in a big gust. How long had I been holding my breath?

　　“The date took me off guard,” I whispered. “That’s all.”

　　He waited, his face full of worry and skepticism.

　　I tried to explain. “I’m not sure what to do . . . what to tell Charlie . . . what to say . . . how to . . .” Myvoice trailed off.

　　“This isn’t about the party?”

　　I frowned. “No. But thanks for reminding me.”

　　The rain was louder as he read my face.

　　“You’re not ready,” he whispered.

　　“I am,” I lied immediately, a reflex reaction. I could tell he saw through it, so I took a deep breath, andtold the truth. “I have to be.”

　　“You don’t have to be anything.”

　　I could feel the panic surfacing in my eyes as I mouthed the reasons. “Victoria, Jane, Caius, whoever wasin my room . . . !”

　　“All the more reason to wait.”

　　“That doesn’t make any sense, Edward!”

　　He pressed his hands more tightly to my face and spoke with slow deliberation.

　　“Bella. Not one of us had a choice. You’ve seen what it’s done . . . to Rosalie especially. We’ve allstruggled, trying to reconcile ourselves with something we had no control over. I won’t let it be that way foryou. You will have a choice.”

　　“I’ve already made my choice.”

　　“You aren’t going through with this because a sword is hanging over your head. We will take care of theproblems, and I will take care of you,” he vowed. “When we’re through it, and there is nothing forcing yourhand, then you can decide to join me, if you still want to. But not because you’re afraid. You won’t be forcedinto this.”

　　“Carlisle promised,” I mumbled, contrary out of habit. “After graduation.”

　　“Not until you’re ready,” he said in a sure voice. “And definitely not while you feel threatened.”

　　I didn’t answer. I didn’t have it in me to argue; I couldn’t seem to find my commitment at the moment.

　　“There.” He kissed my forehead. “Nothing to worry about.”

　　I laughed a shaky laugh. “Nothing but impending doom.”

　　“Trust me.”

　　“I do.”

　　He was still watching my face, waiting for me to relax.

　　“Can I ask you something?” I said.

　　“Anything.”

　　I hesitated, biting my lip, and then asked a different question than the one I was worried about.

　　“What am I getting Alice for graduation?”

　　 He snickered. “It looked like you were getting us both concert tickets —”

　　“That’s right!” I was so relieved, I almost smiled. “The concert in Tacoma. I saw an ad in the paper lastweek, and I thought it would be something you’d like, since you said it was a good CD.”

　　“It’s a great idea. Thank you.”

　　“I hope it’s not sold out.”

　　“It’s the thought that counts. I ought to know.”

　　I sighed.

　　“There’s something else you meant to ask,” he said.

　　I frowned. “You’re good.”

　　“I have lots of practice reading your face. Ask me.”

　　I closed my eyes and leaned into him, hiding my face against his chest. “You don’t want me to be avampire.”

　　“No, I don’t,” he said softly, and then he waited for more. “That’s not a question,” he prompted after amoment.

　　“Well . . . I was worrying about . . . why you feel that way.”

　　“Worrying?” He picked out the word with surprise.

　　“Would you tell me why? The whole truth, not sparing my feelings?”

　　He hesitated for a minute. “If I answer your question, will you then explain your question?”

　　I nodded, my face still hidden.

　　He took a deep breath before he answered. “You could do so much better, Bella. I know that you believeI have a soul, but I’m not entirely convinced on that point, and to risk yours . . .” He shook his head slowly.

　　“For me to allow this — to let you become what I am just so that I’ll never have to lose you — is the mostselfish act I can imagine. I want it more than anything, for myself. But for you, I want so much more. Giving in— it feels criminal. It’s the most selfish thing I’ll ever do, even if I live forever.

　　“If there were any way for me to become human for you — no matter what the price was, I would pay it.”

　　I sat very still, absorbing this.

　　Edward thought he was being selfish.

　　I felt the smile slowly spread across my face.

　　“So . . . it’s not that you’re afraid you won’t . . . like me as much when I’m different — when I’m not softand warm and I don’t smell the same? You really do want to keep me, no matter how I turn out?”

　　He exhaled sharply. “You were worried I wouldn’t like you?” he demanded. Then, before I couldanswer, he was laughing. “Bella, for a fairly intuitive person, you can be so obtuse!”

　　I knew he would think it silly, but I was relieved. If he really wanted me, I could get through the rest . . .

　　somehow. Selfish suddenly seemed like a beautiful word.

　　“I don’t think you realize how much easier it will be for me, Bella,” he said, the echo of his humor still therein his voice, “when I don’t have to concentrate all the time on not killing you. Certainly, there are things I’llmiss. This for one . . .”

　　He stared into my eyes as he stroked my cheek, and I felt the blood rush up to color my skin. He laughedgently.

　　“And the sound of your heart,” he continued, more serious but still smiling a little. “It’s the most significantsound in my world. I’m so attuned to it now, I swear I could pick it out from miles away. But neither of thesethings matter. This,” he said, taking my face in his hands. “You. That’s what I’m keeping. You’ll always be myBella, you’ll just be a little more durable.”

　　I sighed and let my eyes close in contentment, resting there in his hands.

　　“Now will you answer a question for me? The whole truth, not sparing my feelings?” he asked.

　　“Of course,” I answered at once, my eyes opening wide with surprise. What would he want to know?

　　He spoke the words slowly. “You don’t want to be my wife.”

　　My heart stopped, and then broke into a sprint. A cold sweat dewed on the back of my neck and myhands turned to ice.

　　He waited, watching and listening to my reaction.

　　“That’s not a question,” I finally whispered.

　　He looked down, his lashes casting long shadows across his cheekbones, and dropped his hands from my face to pick up my frozen left hand. He played with my fingers while he spoke.

　　“I was worrying about why you felt that way.”

　　I tried to swallow. “That’s not a question, either,” I whispered.

　　“Please, Bella?”

　　“The truth?” I asked, only mouthing the words.

　　“Of course. I can take it, whatever it is.”

　　I took a deep breath. “You’re going to laugh at me.”

　　His eyes flashed up to mine, shocked. “Laugh? I cannot imagine that.”

　　“You’ll see,” I muttered, and then I sighed. My face went from white to scarlet in a sudden blaze ofchagrin. “Okay, fine! I’m sure this will sound like some big joke to you, but really! It’s just so . . . so . . . soembarrassing!” I confessed, and I hid my face against his chest again.

　　There was a brief pause.

　　“I’m not following you.”

　　I tilted my head back and glared at him, embarrassment making me lash out, belligerent.

　　“I’m not that girl, Edward. The one who gets married right out of high school like some small-town hickwho got knocked up by her boyfriend! Do you know what people would think? Do you realize what centurythis is? People don’t just get married at eighteen! Not smart people, not responsible, mature people! I wasn’tgoing to be that girl! That’s not who I am. . . .” I trailed off, losing steam.

　　Edward’s face was impossible to read as he thought through my answer.

　　“That’s all?” he finally asked.

　　I blinked. “Isn’t that enough?”

　　“It’s not that you were . . . more eager for immortality itself than for just me?”

　　And then, though I’d predicted that he would laugh, I was suddenly the one having hysterics.

　　“Edward!” I gasped out between the paroxysms of giggles. “And here . . . I always . . . thought that . . .

　　you were . . . so much . . . smarter than me!”

　　He took me in his arms, and I could feel that he was laughing with me.

　　“Edward,” I said, managing to speak more clearly with a little effort, “there’s no point to forever withoutyou. I wouldn’t want one day without you.”

　　“Well, that’s a relief,” he said.

　　“Still . . . it doesn’t change anything.”

　　“It’s nice to understand, though. And I do understand your perspective, Bella, truly I do. But I’d like itvery much if you’d try to consider mine.”

　　I’d sobered up by then, so I nodded and struggled to keep the frown off my face.

　　His liquid gold eyes turned hypnotic as they held mine.

　　“You see, Bella, I was always that boy. In my world, I was already a man. I wasn’t looking for love —no, I was far too eager to be a soldier for that; I thought of nothing but the idealized glory of the war that theywere selling prospective draftees then — but if I had found . . .” He paused, cocking his head to the side. “Iwas going to say if I had found someone, but that won’t do. If I had found you, there isn’t a doubt in my mindhow I would have proceeded. I was that boy, who would have — as soon as I discovered that you werewhat I was looking for — gotten down on one knee and endeavore............