Wherein Nicholas and his Sister forfeit the goodOpinion of all worldly and prudent People.

　　O n the next morning after Brooker’s disclosure had beenmade, Nicholas returned home. The meeting between himand those whom he had left there was not without strongemotion on both sides; for they had been informed by his letters ofwhat had occurred: and, besides that his griefs were theirs, theymourned with him the death of one whose forlorn and helplessstate had first established a claim upon their compassion, andwhose truth of heart and grateful earnest nature had, every day,endeared him to them more and more.

　　‘I am sure,’ said Mrs Nickleby, wiping her eyes, and sobbingbitterly, ‘I have lost the best, the most zealous, and most attentivecreature that has ever been a companion to me in my life—puttingyou, my dear Nicholas, and Kate, and your poor papa, and thatwell-behaved nurse who ran away with the linen and the twelvesmall forks, out of the question, of course. Of all the tractable,equal-tempered, attached, and faithful beings that ever lived, Ibelieve he was the most so. To look round upon the garden, now,that he took so much pride in, or to go into his room and see itfilled with so many of those little contrivances for our comfort thathe was so fond of making, and made so well, and so little thoughthe would leave unfinished—I can’t bear it, I cannot really. Ah!

　　This is a great trial to me, a great trial. It will be comfort to you,my dear Nicholas, to the end of your life, to recollect how kind and  1109good you always were to him—so it will be to me, to think whatexcellent terms we were always upon, and how fond he always wasof me, poor fellow! It was very natural you should have beenattached to him, my dear—very—and of course you were, and arevery much cut up by this. I am sure it’s only necessary to look atyou and see how changed you are, to see that; but nobody knowswhat my feelings are—nobody can—it’s quite impossible!’

　　While Mrs Nickleby, with the utmost sincerity, gave vent to hersorrows after her own peculiar fashion of considering herselfforemost, she was not the only one who indulged such feelings.

　　Kate, although well accustomed to forget herself when others wereto be considered, could not repress her grief; Madeline wasscarcely less moved than she; and poor, hearty, honest little MissLa Creevy, who had come upon one of her visits while Nicholaswas away, and had done nothing, since the sad news arrived, butconsole and cheer them all, no sooner beheld him coming in at thedoor, than she sat herself down upon the stairs, and bursting intoa flood of tears, refused for a long time to be comforted.

　　‘It hurts me so,’ cried the poor body, ‘to see him come backalone. I can’t help thinking what he must have suffered himself. Iwouldn’t mind so much if he gave way a little more; but he bears itso manfully.’

　　‘Why, so I should,’ said Nicholas, ‘should I not?’

　　‘Yes, yes,’ replied the little woman, ‘and bless you for a goodcreature! but this does seem at first to a simple soul like me—Iknow it’s wrong to say so, and I shall be sorry for it presently—thisdoes seem such a poor reward for all you have done.’

　　‘Nay,’ said Nicholas gently, ‘what better reward could I have,than the knowledge that his last days were peaceful and happy,  1110and the recollection that I was his constant companion, and wasnot prevented, as I might have been by a hundred circumstances,from being beside him?’

　　‘To be sure,’ sobbed Miss La Creevy; ‘it’s very true, and I’m anungrateful, impious, wicked little fool, I know.’

　　With that, the good soul fell to crying afresh, and, endeavouringto recover herself, tried to laugh. The laugh and the cry, meetingeach other thus abruptly, had a struggle for the mastery; the resultwas, that it was a drawn battle, and Miss La Creevy went intohysterics.

　　Waiting until they were all tolerably quiet and composed again,Nicholas, who stood in need of some rest after his long journey,retired to his own room, and throwing himself, dressed as he was,upon the bed, fell into a sound sleep. When he awoke, he foundKate sitting by his bedside, who, seeing that he had opened hiseyes, stooped down to kiss him.

　　‘I came to tell you how glad I am to see you home again.’

　　‘But I can’t tell you how glad I am to see you, Kate.’

　　‘We have been wearying so for your return,’ said Kate, ‘mamaand I, and—and Madeline.’

　　‘You said in your last letter that she was quite well,’ saidNicholas, rather hastily, and colouring as he spoke. ‘Has nothingbeen said, since I have been away, about any future arrangementsthat the brothers have in contemplation for her?’

　　‘Oh, not a word,’ replied Kate. ‘I can’t think of parting from herwithout sorrow; and surely, Nicholas, you don’t wish it!’

　　Nicholas coloured again, and, sitting down beside his sister on alittle couch near the window, said:

　　‘No, Kate, no, I do not. I might strive to disguise my real  1111feelings from anybody but you; but I will tell you that—briefly andplainly, Kate—that I love her.’

　　Kate’s eyes brightened, and she was going to make some reply,when Nicholas laid his hand upon her arm, and went on:

　　‘Nobody must know this but you. She, last of all.’

　　‘Dear Nicholas!’

　　‘Last of all; never, though never is a long day. Sometimes, I tryto think that the time may come when I may honestly tell her this;but it is so far off; in such distant perspective, so many years mustelapse before it comes, and when it does come (if ever) I shall be sounlike what I am now, and shall have so outlived my days of youthand romance—though not, I am sure, of love for her—that even Ifeel how visionary all such hopes must be, and try to crush themrudely myself, and have the pain over, rather than suffer time towither them, and keep the disappointment in store. No, Kate!

　　Since I have been absent, I have had, in that poor fellow who isgone, perpetually before my eyes, another instance of themunificent liberality of these noble brothers. As far as in me lies, Iwill deserve it, and if I have wavered in my bounden duty to thembefore, I am now determined to discharge it rigidly, and to putfurther delays and temptations beyond my reach.’

　　‘Before you say another word, dear Nicholas,’ said Kate,turning pale, ‘you must hear what I have to tell you. I came onpurpose, but I had not the courage. What you say now, gives menew heart.’ She faltered, and burst into tears.

　　There was that in her manner which prepared Nicholas forwhat was coming. Kate tried to speak, but her tears prevented her.

　　‘Come, you foolish girl,’ said Nicholas; ‘why, Kate, Kate, be awoman! I think I know what you would tell me. It concerns Mr  1112Frank, does it not?’

　　Kate sunk her head upon his shoulder, and sobbed out ‘Yes.’

　　‘And he has offered you his hand, perhaps, since I have beenaway,’ said Nicholas; ‘is that it? Yes. Well, well; it is not so difficult,you see, to tell me, after all. He offered you his hand?’

　　‘Which I refused,’ said Kate.

　　‘Yes; and why?’

　　‘I told him,’ she said, in a trembling voice, ‘all that I have sincefound you told mama; and while I could not conceal from him, andcannot from you, that—that it was a pang and a great trial, I did sofirmly, and begged him not to see me any more.’

　　‘That’s my own brave Kate!’ said Nicholas, pressing her to hisbreast. ‘I knew you would.’

　　‘He tried to alter my resolution,’ said Kate, ‘and declared that,be my decision what it might, he would not only inform his unclesof the step he had taken, but would communicate it to you also,directly you returned. I am afraid,’ she added, her momentarycomposure forsaking her, ‘I am afraid I may not have said,strongly enough, how deeply I felt such disinterested love, andhow earnestly I prayed for his future happiness. If you do talktogether, I should—I should like him to know that.’

　　‘And did you suppose, Kate, when you had made this sacrificeto what you knew was right and honourable, that I should shrinkfrom mine?’ said Nicholas tenderly.

　　‘Oh no! not if your position had been the same, but—’

　　‘But it is the same,’ interrupted Nicholas. ‘Madeline is not thenear relation of our benefactors, but she is closely bound to themby ties as dear; and I was first intrusted with her history, speciallybecause they reposed unbounded confidence in me, and believed  1113that I was as true as steel. How base would it be of me to takeadvantage of the circumstances which placed her here, or of theslight service I was happily able to render her, and to seek toengage her affections when the result must be, if I succeeded, thatthe brothers would be disappointed in their darling wish ofestablishing her as their own child, and that I must seem to hopeto build my fortunes on their compassion for the young creaturewhom I had so meanly and unworthily entrapped: turning hervery gratitude and warmth of heart to my own purpose andaccount, and trading in her misfortunes! I, too, whose duty, andpride, and pleasure, Kate, it is to have other claims upon me whichI will never forget; and who have the means of a comfortable andhappy life already, and have no right to look beyond it! I havedetermined to remove this weight from my mind. I doubt whetherI have not done wrong, even now; and today I will, without reserveor equivocation, disclose my real reasons to Mr Cherryble, andimplore him to take immediate measures for removing this younglady to the shelter of some other roof.’

　　‘Today? so very soon?’

　　‘I have thought of this for weeks, and why should I postpone it?

　　If the scene through which I have just passed has taught me toreflect, and has awakened me to a more anxious and careful senseof duty, why should I wait until the impression has cooled? Youwould not dissuade me, Kate; now would you?’

　　‘You may grow rich, you know,’ said Kate.

　　‘I may grow rich!’ repeated Nicholas, with a mournful smile, ‘ay,and I may grow old! But rich or poor, or old or young, we shallever be the same to each other, and in that our comfort lies. Whatif we have but one home? It can never be a solitary one to you and  1114me. What if we were to remain so true to these first impressions asto form no others? It is but one more link to the strong chain thatbinds us together. It seems but yesterday that we were playfellows,Kate, and it will seem but tomorrow when we are staid old people,looking back to these cares as we look back, now, to those of ourchildish days: and recollecting with a melancholy pleasure that thetime was, when they could move us. Perhaps then, when we arequaint old folks and talk of the times when our step was lighterand our hair not grey, we may be even thankful for the trials thatso endeared us to each other, and turned our lives into thatcurrent, down which we shall have glided so peacefully andcalmly. And having caught some inkling of our story, the youngpeople about us—as young as you and I are now, Kate—may cometo us for sympathy, and pour distresses which hope andinexperience could scarcely feel enough for, into thecompassionate ears of the old bachelor brother and his maidensister.’

　　Kate smiled through her tears as Nicholas drew this picture;but they were not tears of sorrow, although they continued to fallwhen he had ceased to speak.

　　‘Am I not right, Kate?’ he said, after a short silence.

　　‘Quite, quite, dear brother; and I cannot tell you how happy Iam that I have acted as you would have had me.’

　　‘You don’t regret?’

　　‘N-n-no,’ said Kate timidly, tracing some pattern upon theground with her little foot. ‘I don’t regret having done what washonourable and right, of course; but I do r............